Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Here - take that!

When I first got pregnant I was so excited - I searched the net for anything and everything. I subscribed for lots of lists etc.

When I miscarried, I had the painful task of removing myself from these lists. I thought I had done this all a long time ago.

Today I got an email from a list server that I had forgotten I had subscribed to.

Right at the top it says "Can you believe your baby is nearly 1 year old?"

Yep - if my baby had lived he\she would have been 1 year old next month. How different my life would be today had that been the case. Instead of throwing drugs down my throat, crying over baby clothes, and shielding my eyes from pregnant women, I would have been preparing to celebrate my baby's first birthday.

I have been pretty upbeat lately but this has certainly given me quite a sad moment. I won't let myself dwell on what could have been though. Writing this will be all the time I give myself for this. Once this is posted, I am going to move on and place all emotions in the "emotional wastebasket".

Funny thing is though, that when I pressed the "unsubscribe " button, I was asked to provide feedback. There were a number of options like "this info is not relevant to me any more", "I don't have time to read the emails" and even the one I ended up choosing "I lost my baby/miscarried". I hope they get the hint and stop sending me emails.

Now to pull myself up and move on.

p.s. I got another email from them - with a play tent offer - again I unsubscribed and chose the same option. If I get it again, I will be complaining to the company - BUGGER OFF. (not you my lovely readers, the company that sent me these emails).


At 7:28 pm, Blogger Mari said...

So sorry that you had such an awful shock! Oh God that would be been like an arrow through the heart...My thoughts are with you sweets...take care OK!

At 7:17 pm, Blogger Lesley said...

Bugsy... just when you think your over the worst something or someone reminds you. Sorry you had to go through that... It must have been very hard... I am glad you are thinking positive though.
Luv Lesley

At 8:37 pm, Blogger Burnt Karma said...


Although there will probably be many more days that suck the big one, just know that you are among friends and we'll all get you through it.


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