The bad results are in
Thank you for all your comments. My heart may be broken into pieces but I have lots of friends trying to hold it into place and I do appreciate that.
I got my results back and they are not good.
HCG which is supposed to double every 2 days (a 66% increase over two days is the minimum acceptable level - went from 109 last week to 249 this week - just not good enough to be acceptable.
Progesterone which was 50.9 only 2 weeks ago, is now sitting at 16
Oestrogen which was 421 only 2 weeks ago is not 339
So all this boils down to the hard fact that tukka is leaving us. I don't need a doctor to tell me that. But tomorrow one will say those words, I just know it.
I'm numb. Just a shell now. An empty vessel that has a hole and can never be filled.
Hubbs is being strong but not long after I got the results he has gone to his "fishroom" to do some work. I think he has gone to have a good cry without me seeing. My poor darling husband. The one thing we so desperately want is once again out of our reach.
I am keeping busy from my bed. I have started a jumper for Hubbs and I have also started a scarf with the new yarn Katt gave me. Anything to keep my mind off my aching body and aching heart.
posted by Bugsy @ 3:49:00 pm
10 comments
10 Comments:
OMG bugs I'm soooo sorry
At times like this I really hate the English language. It is completely useless in trying to communicate feelings that are so intense.
I have no words of wisdom or words of comfort for you. I know your heart is breaking. I wish I could change the universe so that it wasnt.
I'm so sorry Bugsy. I know there is nothing no one could ever say to make you feel better. I know you will get your child one day. My heart is aching for you. It's good that you're trying to stay busy. I am keeping you and your husband in my thoughts.
Oh God Bugs not you, why oh why..not you!!!!!!I checked your blog this morning and here I find out the worst news ever. If you need me I'm here.
Mari
I am so sorry - I am stunned and so sad for you and Hubbs. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Sorry to read the heartbreaking news.
All our thoughs are with you.
Cathy
Thinking of you. So sorry.
I am so sorry. I agree with Panda, there just aren't words.
Sending you thoughts and hugs from the U.S.
Anne
Oh Bugsy, I'm so very sorry. There is nothing that can be said or done, just know that I'm here for whatever you need.
Bugsy,
I am so sorry. I didn't expect to see this news, I can't say anything to make you feel better so I'm just going to say that life sucks so bad sometimes. It's not fair.
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