Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Friends and "Friends"

Oh my sweet sweet friends. (those I truly can call friends <-- see no " " around the word this time!)

I have sat here this morning and bawled at how beautiful each and every one of you are. Thank you! Especially my de-lurkers - lovely to have you on board.

You guys are so right. I guess all these years I have hung onto the "friendship" as I don't really have many friends in real life, and I love those girls. They are the innocents and I pray that they make it to adulthood unscathed. Though this seems unlikely with the way their mother behaves. Don't get her wrong though - under it all she loves those girls - I just don't think she knows how to express love very well. Her parents were quite standoffish, not like my Mum who loved a cuddle. Very different I guess.

I have done nothing but think about this since yesterday morning and when my mobile rang last night with (private number) displayed, I simply ignored it. No message was left. The fact that I did this tells me that I don't want to put the effort in to save this. It is done. I won't be making any effort to contact her - perhaps this is the cowards way out. If she contacts me I will deal with it then. But if I see her phone number come up, I will not be answering the phone. I just don't need it.

On other things - My chart is looking okay - Bugsy's chart but I am not holding out any great hopes for this cycle. We will just have to see what happens. I don't think I will be running out to buy HPTs this time though. I do think I will go get a blood test tomorrow to see how my progesterone levels are going. I think that is my main problem, so I would be interested to see where they are at even in a non pregnant cycle.

ok well have a great day guys and catch you all soon.

3 Comments:

At 11:37 am, Blogger Mama Mouse said...

(((HUGS))) Take care of yourself and don't worry about her. You've done enough ... now live for YOU and your husband! YOUR life should be in focus now!

 
At 1:16 am, Blogger Anne said...

I have read so much today about the completely insensitive people who talk to us mothers who've lost.

I'm at a loss for how to explain your "friend". But I do know that's not how friends behave. Friends are who you call when the world falls down. They're the ones you know you can count on in a crisis. And they're the ones you want to share joyful news with.

It doesn't sound like she's any of those things. And you have enough on your plate.

I'm so sorry.

{{{Hugs}}}

 
At 7:10 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Bugsy...
Today probably isnt a good day for me to reply to this, so I wont even attempt to...
Just think about you and hubby and what you both need...
Sending my love...

MrsHUGS

 

Post a Comment

<< Home

 

eXTReMe Tracker