Sunday, September 05, 2004

I seriously didn't fall into a black hole!

ok - I am back.

Too long since I posted and I apologise for that. This is a not so brief rundown of what has been going on:

1. The company I am working for is going through a merger with another company and I have been involved heavily in that. I am supposed to be working 90% of my time on Integration and 10% of my time on my own job, but unfortunately my boss has failed to plan for any sort of backup to my job, because he thinks we (meaning the department) can just "handle it". That isn't happening so I have found myself stupidly doing incredible hours (sometimes up to 16 hours a day) working both tasks.

2. Unfortunately I had some complications after the Op when I remained in pain for quite some time. Upon investigation the surgeon announced that cells in my stomach had necrotised (died) and the fluid pouring out of the wounds was the dead cells that had liquidised. Oh and he said that it was painful (no Sh$t). So two lots of antibiotics later we pretty much had that beat.

The incisions are still healing, more than 4 weeks after the Op. On Friday I did something (yet to work out what) and the incision in my belly button popped open again and has been bleeding since. (bugger). I will have to see how it goes and maybe go back to see the surgeon.

3. I have been really down lately about everything. The anniversary of my Father's death on the 15th August closely followed by the 1st anniversary of my miscarriage on the 20th August. The only good news I have is that my tubes were very clear (dye shot out at the rate of an express train he said), and my ovaries look perfect. My infertility cause ? Who knows. He only said that it might be weight related, that although I am overweight but not obese and still ovulating on my own, that my optimal fertile weight may be less. So dieting has begun in earnest.

So what does the future have in store?

Today I fly out to Sydney for 3 days for work to do with this merger integration. Bad timing as I am due to Ovulate any second and it isn't much good if hubby is in Melbourne and I am in Sydney but hopefully we still have a chance.

I have felt so much like some big cosmic clock has begun ticking ever since the doctor said those fatal words "You will be so fertile the first couple of months after this operation". So now I feel like I am throwing away a really good chance because I won't be in the same state as hubby. Hopefully not.

Ok - well since this is the longest post in history I had better end it there and get packing!


At 10:14 pm, Blogger Burnt Karma said...

Hey Bugsy!
I got that "you'll be really fertile for a couple of months" line from a nurse too - and boy, did that make me feral! I was in a similar situation to you - work suddenly went haywire and hubbs was working 20 hour days right when I was ovulating. Pissed off much? Yeah!

Good luck with the weight as well. One more stress you don't need eh? Just don't worry about trying to relax, it means nothing. I finally got pregnant when I was the most uptight and depressed I'd ever been.


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